Just 4 Laughs: Funny Team Eric Vs. Team Bill Article

The Wall Street Journal blog posted a funny article on the Bill vs. Eric debate. It was written by Julie Steinberg.

“True Blood” Showdown: Team Bill vs. Team Eric

Entertainment Weekly’s vampire cover last week was devoted to the men who populate our nightmarish fantasies, or fantastical  nightmares, or whatever collective craze for vampires is obsessing so many of us right now.

Online readers were asked to rank their favorites and to no one’s surprise (with the exception of those of us who struggle with his noun-verb construction) Robert Pattinson took 49% of the vote. More interesting was the breakdown between “True Blood”’s top contenders: Team Eric scored 19%. Team Bill? A measly 6%. The masses have spoken: Team Bill, well, sucks. Here are our top reasons why everyone’s Season One favorite vamp has started to sour and why Eric Northman is a welcome beam of Viking sunshine.

Bill’s passivity. No longer the aggressive, defend-to-the-death Civil War soldier, Bill (played by Stephen Moyer) spends a lot of time moping around, being held prisoner, wallowing in the past, or, you know, just mulling things over. Sure, Lorena held him captive for a few days at Eric’s behest. That said, his finally taking action and running into the Fellowship of the Sun screaming “Soooookie” was less than effective. Even Sookie looked at him expectantly, waiting to see what he was going to do to Steve Newlin. And he did… nothing; Jason Stackhouse ended up saving the day. And Bill had the gall to proclaim irrelevantly to Eric that Sookie was still his. We get it, Bill, Sookie’s yours – even though you show a fifth of the interest Eric does in actually wanting her. Darn it Bill, you haven’t done one remotely useful thing this season, except maybe refrain from ruining Jessica’s relationship with Hoyt.

Eric (played by Alexander Skarsgård), on the other hand, isn’t content to sit around. He’s a doer, a go-getter, a Swedish Ivy-Leaguer overachiever, if you will. Even if he did let Sookie walk into a trap, he was just being loyal to Godric, his maker/BFF/potential lover. Eric’s all business, the Putin of the supernatural world, and his quiet authority is infinitely more powerful than Bill’s temper tantrums.

Even Bill’s looks are starting to suffer. As cool as clotted cream in season 1, Bill’s started to show the effects of some aging, which, seeing as he’s a vampire and theoretically stuck in time, can’t be a good thing. His pallor, erotically chalky at first, pales in comparison to Eric’s tan and muscular physique that screams eternal virility (plus, his whiteness appears to end at his chin, like a bad make-up job — we’re looking at you, “True Blood” stylists!). The spark between Eric and Sookie has only intensified, whereas the love scenes between her and Bill are lukewarm at best.

Move over Bill, head on back to Lorena, and let Eric carry the rest of the season (on his impossibly broad shoulders, please).

You can see it here too.

Hope you got a laugh out of it.


~ by simba317 on August 10, 2009.

One Response to “Just 4 Laughs: Funny Team Eric Vs. Team Bill Article”

  1. Ha! That’s fabulous. I don’t know why anyone would prefer Bill anyway. Eric just keeps getting better. He’s still not exactly book-Eric level, personality-wise, but I think he may get there.

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